HEART+          .


Double up on Baby Love

Can you imagine the shock I got to find out that this mama was carrying not one, but two boys?!  I mean, come on, I didn’t even look this good carrying one baby.  Marssie, was shining during her session…literally grinning ear to ear.  Chad, of course, making this so easy for her.  Their love and chemistry is so undeniable and I am certain that their baby boys are going to be welcomed with so much love.

I get emotional during maternity shoots.  I’m one of those that actually LOVES being pregnant.  I love the feeling, I love watching my body change, I love that everyone wants to feed me great food! LOL.  I love it all.  So it is always a joy to capture a woman in this season.  I can also sympathize with her emotions of excitement and nerves balled into one.

Here’s the thing about pregnancy.  When you’re pregnant, everyone will always try to prepare you while sharing their vivid stories about how they carried and how they delivered; yet it is less likely that you’ll hear about the after math.  What happens when you’re strapping the baby into the carseat for the first time?  We don’t mention how it’s feels crazy and scary that nurses would release a brand new little human being into your hands and expect us to know what to do with them.  We don’t mention that the drive home is the scariest drive you’ll probably take and you’ll probably feel like you should drive 15 miles per hour.  This gets easier after the first, but geez, the first baby is super duper scary.  Here’s the thing moms to be….it really does get easier and better, and somehow, this weird thing that God wired within us kicks into gear and we are like super women out of no where!  Our “spidey senses” (<sorry, I have 2 boys) rise and we can hear just about anything.  We can heal by simply snuggling our babies into our arms.  We produce food…I mean come on!  It’s absolutely amazing!

Here’s another thing about after delivering!  You’ll be tired….really really tired.  You will need a lot of grace and a lot of love from your significant other, and you’ll need to give it too.  It’s funny because I think that when we are tired, we as humans are at our worst….we are not patient nor kind.  But try really hard to be.  This is new after all isn’t it.  I also recommend you find a great Netflix series or movies to binge watch with your love on the couch.  I mean, you’ll be lacking sleep so you might as well enjoy being awake and find something to distract you from the fact that you’re so tired and these babies need you.

Finally….phone a friend-or an acquaintance!  Anyone who’s available really!  After having a baby, you naturally feel at your worst.  You’re tired, and can barely muster up any energy (imagine two babies at once-like Marssie and Chad are going to have) and you’re certainly not going to have a lot of time to get ready (you will have to for appointments and stuff) so it is in this moment that we want to isolate and not let anyone see us in this condition unless they are like SUPER close to us, like a parent who will not judge us and still love us for who we are underneath all of the mess, but….restrain from isolation the best you can!  Phone a friend at least once a week.  Have them come over and chat with you, help you for an hour so you can shower or drive somewhere….simply, don’t do this alone all of the time.  Don’t you worry though, somehow you gain strength, every time you see those adorable baby faces, every time you get your baby snuggles in, the smell of a freshly bathed baby….it’s just a heart explosion that will save you day after day!

Oh wait!  Oneeeeee more thing.  Give your significant other a lot of grace!  Did I say this already?  Well I’m going to say it again….remember that they’ve never done this either.  Remember that perhaps this comes WAY more natural to you than to them.  Be clear as glass as to what you expect from them-don’t expect them to know….oh God please don’t expect them to know!  Ha.  They’re trying and they will feel very helpless (especially if you’re breastfeeding).  They need as much kisses and love as you do (although, you may think you deserve way more…you do….but they don’t get it….lol).  Just know that it’s better to be a team and to speak exactly what you’re expecting and needing from them on a day to day basis, even if it gets old.  This way you both are feeling supported.  You won’t be having sex for a while either, so just another reason to love each other well in different ways because those weeks will seem so long. TMI? Sorry.

I know this all may seem like a nightmare waiting to happen for those who haven’t experienced it.  But truly-it’s a miracle.  A miracle that you can go through all of this and still desire to repeat it.  Because in the end of the day-the joy far outweighs the struggle.  No one can prepare you enough for the journey ahead-no book-nothing-it’s just a unique experience that you have to live out.  So my friends out there….get ready for the wildest rollercoaster yet!  That’s a great example….a rollercoaster.  When you’re on it, you wonder….”why the heck did I get on this, get me offfffffff!!!!!!!”  But as soon as you’re off and on the ground, you’re like….”hey that wasn’t that bad!  I want to do it again!”  3 kids later, I can tell you that is the truth.

So much love ahead….and Chad and Marssie have doubled up on it!

Note from Rubi Z:

Chad and Marssie….I don’t have a doubt in my mind that you’re going to be epic parents.  Those boys are already so blessed, they don’t even know it yet.  I can only imagine how perfect you two are going to be at raising boys.  I have two boys of my own and they are so much fun.  I’m sure all of Chads’ dreams of being a “dad coach” for them will come true and I’m sure they’re going to be the biggest mama’s boys!  Congratulations!!!!

With all my heart and soul…..Rubi Z